Mimi Faust and the Pseudo-Righteousness of Hip-Hop


Every hip-hop head and their mama has something (negative) to say about Mimi Faust and her right to enter the world of p###—even Steve Harvey’s rich ass! Sure, it’s easy to “go in” on this woman for doing a pr0n video. (Just so you know–I’ve already made my pr0n video—to be “leaked” the week after I get on one of these reality shows! I’m-a show ’em how a crusty ol’ dude puts it down. I have 216 millimeters of phallus I’d like to share with the world! B### bag recommended.)

Of course it is! I could write a blog and blast her to smithereens, but that would be cliché-ish for a C.O.O.N. like me! I have to write against the grain. I could write every manner of evil and call her a s###, trick, hoe, skeezer, prostitute and c##-dumpster, but I wouldn’t be true to myself as a deep thinker and a compassionate person, who views all women (no matter how far they’ve fallen off the wagon) as the “Mother of All Living”—God’s procreative instrument and the first teachers of our children. So I’ll let the herd talk that nastiness about this woman.

Indeed, hip-hop heads are goin’ in on Mimi and they have every right, since she’s put her life out here for public consumption and scrutiny. And yes! She’s said things and carried herself like she was above the fray of ratchetness on her show, (You think Joseline ain’t havin’ a field-day dissin’ her now?) “Love & Hip-Hop.” But there is a saying; “It’s woman’s prerogative to change her mind.” We all change our minds about certain things! And if five million dollars (the amount Mimi allegedly made) were dangled in front of you—dare I say that many of us would assume the position—face down, ass up? I think we are being hypocritical—even more hypocritical than Mimi’s prior rants on womanness.

But now, let me get to where I’m going. If you notice, little is being said about Nikko, her on-screen lover paramour. All the hate, all the angst, and all the name-calling is being directed at poor Mimi. We are judging Mimi and saying nadda about Nikko. Yes! We are sexist! Mimi is the w#### and Nikko is a stud, playa, pimp, paramour—the envy of many-a-man! In hip-hop’s pseudo-righteous mind, someone’s daughter is getting slutted-out, while someone’s son is receiving congratulatory high-fives from friends and family alike. #DoubleStandard

Let’s kick da ballistics! P### is supported mostly by men! Men are its major consumers and hip-hop and p### have always had a cozy relationship. Most of us watch p###, make p### videos, and watch rap videos with the thirstiness of a camel on the desert for 30 fortnights (one fortnight= 2 weeks)! And most of you Negro males got hella p### saved on your computer or phone—and beez hiding it from girlfriends and spouses alike.

But what I really abhor with major loathing is the commentary being spewed on these Internets of a pseudo (false)-religious nature. Starting with Steve Harvey’s commentary, which has been echoed by the most non-going-to-church-not-knowing-a-damned-thang-about-the-Bible folk! I don’t subscribe to any of that religious mumbo-jumbo with regards to sex, nudity, fornication—f######! Like Steve Harvey, whose commentary is rooted in his religious views of sex as “dirty,” “nasty,” “shameful,” and “secretive”—you diss Mimi because you have similar religiously constructed views of sex. So what? She had sex on camera for five million dollars! Take away the pseudo-religious posturing and you have a woman who has set herself and child up for life! But I hear you! “She sold her soul to the devil!” And just how much is the price of a soul going for these days? Listen to yourselves, you ig-nant mythology-believing devil believers! (I’ll kick the “devil” in his ass and dare him to burn me!) I hear you! “Wait until her child hears about the video or sees the video!” Really? Does your child know all the dirt that you’ve done or will do?

I’ll tell you a secret! When my children were young (they’s grown now) they snuck into daddy’s treasure-trove of p### and found a video of daddy boinking the hell out of some white chick! This, they revealed to me once they became adults! Ewwwww! They saw daddy’s hang-low plowing p####### from here to Timbuktu! But did it scar them for life? Did they have “issues” with me or their own sexuality as they grew up? No! From what they tell me, they had a good laugh and said daddy beez “workin’ it out!” (So put your p### in the most secretive of places ‘cause kids beez snooping around when you ain’t home!) If only I would’ve received five million dollars for screwing that white chick! But no! All I got was five million reasons to kick her to the curb!

Point being? When that day comes for Mimi’s child to understand what mama did she’ll be okay. Not only will she be okay, but she will defend her mother from the likes of you hating-ass Negroes that would call her mother out of her name!

Would I take this stance if it were any of my daughters doing a p### video? Absolutely! I actually happen to have two daughters that are “Urban Models” and are/were strippers, so my heart has long been tested in the area of knowing that my seeds are in the adult sex industry. (And BTW, they are high-school graduates, working on degrees and have a great relationship with me, their father.) It just happens that their father (me!) is well-educated and understands the religio-sexual nature of the society in which we live and does not buy into its false notions of sex as “nasty” and women as “w#####” who choose to express their sexuality through this artistic genre. I’m too well-informed to go ape-s### over the beauty of the nude human body! From the get-go it has been written that God made a nude Adam & Eve and when He/She finished His/Her works the Bible commentators wrote that He said it was, “Good, very good!” (Genesis 1:31) So how does nudity go from that to being ugly and nasty and secretive?

Unlike Laurence Fishburne, whose daughter decided to give p### a whirl and he publicly disowned her—I’m far too liberal to turn my back on my (adult) children during the growing pains (and pangs) of their lives.

Sex is beautiful—and at one point in human history sex was the highest form of devotion to the Deity (God). Men made sex dirty and shameful through religion and this is the root of your disdain for Mimi’s decision to do p###. I don’t buy Christianity’s religion’s dark-horse understanding of the beautiful act of sex that was once so sacred.

Mimi Faust isn’t a w####! Mimi Faust isn’t a s###. She’s simply a woman who has chosen to parlay her hip-hop notoriety into a lifetime of financial security. If anything, Mimi is hip-hop’s equivalent of “Sula”—revisited!—Toni Morrison’s character that followed a similar path to save her town—a people that were dying from boredom, because they led mundane lives. Sula gave hope to a people who had nothing to live for by having sex with guys around town and though people had no computers to troll, she simply allowed her sexual escapades to be known, which gave her town something to gossip about. Sula played the role of the w#### to save people! She w##### herself out to these people who had never found their own “Raison d’être” (reason for existence). Without Sula, they were dead! And like the townspeople of Sula, many of you troll these Internets for stories that give your own lives meaning and some of you live vicariously through your perceived fuckery of people like Mimi. Mimi has more balls, yea, more smarts—Doff! More freedom to not give a damn what people think of her than the “sheeple” that follow her every movement!

Mimi is no w####! Yea! We are the w#####, because it is us (men) who will buy her video or bootleg it and catch many-a nut off this woman’s life. We are the voyeuristic w##### who hide in cyberspace and name-call and then go to church and point fingers at those whom we believe God has not saved yet, but I have news for you, you ol’ pseudo-righteous religious poser—and that is, the so-called w####? The prostitute?—the Mimis and Kim Ks of the world—that neighborhood female crack-head whose selling her stank-box to support her habit? Jesus had compassion for the likes of these women and said this; “Verily [truly] I say unto you, that the publicans [gang bangers] and the harlots [prostitutes] go into the kingdom of God before you” (Matthew 21:31). (I bet you never read this scripture!)

The woman that you rap about not kissing in the mouf—Jesus says they have a seat in the kingdom, because somehow, some way, there is redemption for the dregs of society.

At-the-end-of-the-day Mimi will land on her feet “perpendicular to the square” (upright) and live out the meaning unto which she was called. Mimi’s life will teach some of us something—if nothing more than perseverance, long-suffering, non-judgment, compassion and empathy. Mimi will be all right, so respect her when you see her in the street. Respect her because everyone deserves respect at whatever plain they are on in this physical realm. The Universe requires that! That. Is. All.